EPISODE SNEAK PEEK:
”I should, I should, I should do all the fucking things and when I say it out loud, it just makes me angry because no I shouldn’t.”
with Lauren Frontiera
WHAT'S IN THIS EPISODE?
If you haven’t read Elle Luna’s The Crossroads of Should and Must, I can’t recommend it enough (had to refrain from saying YOU SHOULD just then…). I was so inspired by the book that today’s entire episode is all about it. I’m sharing the shoulds and musts (if you’re like huh? ... I’ll explain in the episode) that I wrestle with daily growing this podcast. And in total honesty, some days I walk out a champion. Other days, I lay flat on the mat defeated.
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WAIT. EXPLAIN SHOULD VS. MUST.
In this episode, I define Should and Must based on what Elle shares in her book. Here are the excerpts from the book that I read in the episode...
"Should is how other people want us to live our lives.
It's all of the expectations that others layer upon us. Sometimes, Shoulds are small, seemingly innocuous, and easily accommodated. "You should listen to that song," for example. At other times, Shoulds are highly influential systems of thought that pressure and, at their most destructive, coerce us to live our lives differently.
When we choose Should, we're choosing to live our life for someone or something other than ourselves. The journey to Should can be smooth, the rewards can seem clear, and the options are often plentiful."
"Must is different.
Must is who we are, what we believe, and what we do when we are alone with our truest, most authentic self. It's that which calls to us most deeply. It's our convictions, our passions, our deepest held urges and desires - unavoidable, undeniable, and inexplicable. Unlike Should, Must doesn't accept compromises.
Must is when we stop conforming to other people's ideals and start connecting to our own - and this allows us to cultivate our full potential as individuals. To choose Must is to say yes to hard work and constant effort, to say yes to a journey without a road map or guarantees, and in so doing, to say yes to what Joseph Campbell called "the experience of being alive, so that our life experiences on the purely physical plane will have resonance within our innermost being and reality, so that we actually feel the rapture of being alive.
Choosing Must is the greatest thing we can do with our lives."
For more, grab Elle Luna's book here.
LINKS FROM THIS EPISODE:
- Elle Luna's article on medium.com, The Crossroads of Should and Must
- Elle Luna's book, The Crossroads of Should and Must: Find and Follow Your Passion
- Join the Facebook community